I booked tickets for me and the girls to go to visit my parents December 2nd- 16th. I'm really looking forward to it this year. Plus, the exchange rate is good at the moment.
Cormac quit one of his bands for the moment so money is something we are keeping an eye on. I'm going to have to drop Jane from Sue's, even though I love her there. We just gotta cut back where ever we can. Thought the brakes had went on the car yesterday, after Cormac had ran over a nail the day before. They are fine, but holy stress.
I went to see the psychologist for the first time yesterday. She's nice, we chatted about my past which I do find difficult to dredge up. It's hard for me to be honest with her, but I'm going to try to be. No sugar coating. She isn't what I expected as she's warm, liberal minded and well traveled... so I'll go this road with her. I also saw the psychiatrist yesterday and I upped my dosage on Zoloft (Lustral here) as I'm tolerating it really well and have some improvement.
The weather here has turned chilly but I can't believe the sun persists in shining warmly down on us. Is this Ireland? We've had real seasons so far this year. Snowy and frosty winter, bright and rainy spring, warm sunny summer... now a chilly, sunny, leaf-changing fall? Perfect. I'm ready for pumpkins and warm coffee and soup.
I've had to pull away from some of my commitments. I'm feeling guilt and strain with the LLL girls at the moment, too, and its stressing me out. I don't like to be on bad terms with people. I had to turn down Foroige this year, too, even though I know Smadar needs the help and I love the kids... but even one day a week where someone definitely needs me to turn up is more than I can give right now. I'm getting orders in on a regular basis, and supplying the shop on the weekends. I'm close to popping into the Ardkeen Market and have a couple of festivals coming up. I'm trying to find time to do my accounts but I can barely sit down and right this update. But I needed to get some things out of my head on to paper so I don't need to think about them anymore. If you understand how that goes. If you journal, you do. I feel the lack of LJ in my life, which sounds stupid but I used to rely on LJ heavily to work out my feelings- like having a chat with a friend.
So, business is good, I had quite a few successful festivals and I've updated the http://www.thebohokitchen.com site so if you want to check it out and give me feedback that's great. I was finding that the blog format was confusing for people and I wanted to present a more business-like facade. I'm working on a plan or even bringing in a partner or two for the long term, I don't know. It's hard to share something you've worked hard to build up, but I know some talented people and I think to expand as much as I'd like (a premises) I'll need the help of people I know and trust. So, at least there is extra money coming in. I'm lucky to have another expat, Nancy, who loves helping me out at the stall. She's an au pair in Tipperary. Another family au pair, Katie, from Canada, is great too. I haven't been socializing much, they came down and stayed over one night and it was great to have adult time.
There are piles of laundry, walls unpainted... ugh. I've been trying to take the time aside everyday to do something interactive with Jane, too, like painting or arts and crafts (she loves it) because she's starting to act out in a way that makes me feel she isn't getting enough individual attention. Everyone was right, as soon as Harper started really moving around, playing with toys... Jane's attitude has changed. She's putting her foot down about possession of her toys. She wants to keep Harper away when she builds things with her blocks or forts. It's also tough getting her to stop bugging her when I'm nursing her. She wants to play with Harper, too, and she loves her loads. She just has a bad habit of grabbing her leg if she crawls away from her, or pulling her down. Boy oh boy. Jane's sleep is all over the place again, too.
I've joined a gym, and I'm going to try and go. Today, even. If I go even once a week its worth what I've paid. I need the time to unwind.
Cormac has a new blues band and their first gig is on Friday. Cormac's parents are going to come around and watch the girls so I get to see them play! I'm very excited to get out and get dressed up but I'm even happier for Cormac because I know he has been dying inside playing crappy cover songs he hates and he finally gets to play for musical merit after a long hiatus.
Enough time wasted here, I need to plan out the weekend